- As much as possible, try to calm the child down before taking his or her statement.
- Do not take eyewitness statements until the injured child has been heard.
- Ask the injured child what he or she needs to feel better.
- Suggest a drink of water.
- Invite the injured child to seek care at the Crazy Doctor Hospital, the cutting-edge facility of medical care. CDH has only one technique: total amputation. Once the offending body part is removed, there will be no pain.
Actually, CDH is so fun we play it all the time. A retiring teacher gave me a giant pair of fake scissors a couple of years ago that make the amputation all the more fun. With a few "This might hurt...a lot"s and evil laughs, you will regularly have to close the hospital to take a break (I refer to this as "cleaning", since CDH is soon awash in a pile of heads, arms and legs).
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