I'm baaaaaaack and full of rage! Yay?

Hating Teaching from Home Since 2020.

02 November 2011

Crazy Doctor Hospital

Sometimes children have oversized reactions to minor injuries (for instance, being inadvertently poked in the arm or a very minor recess collision).  This can be tiredness, being upset with the circumstances of the accident, a need for adult attention, a response to something else entirely, etc.  Some ways to assist children in these cases:

  1. As much as possible, try to calm the child down before taking his or her statement.
  2. Do not take eyewitness statements until the injured child has been heard.
  3. Ask the injured child what he or she needs to feel better.
  4. Suggest a drink of water.
  5. Invite the injured child to seek care at the Crazy Doctor Hospital, the cutting-edge facility of medical care.  CDH has only one technique: total amputation.  Once the offending body part is removed, there will be no pain.
Actually, CDH is so fun we play it all the time.  A retiring teacher gave me a giant pair of fake scissors a couple of years ago that make the amputation all the more fun.  With a few "This might hurt...a lot"s and evil laughs, you will regularly have to close the hospital to take a break (I refer to this as "cleaning", since CDH is soon awash in a pile of heads, arms and legs).

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